My 12 Year old child has been diagnosed with ADHD. Should I medicate?

So obviously medication is a personal decision because no one else will know your child’s circumstances and all that etc. with that said though, my advice is if you have the opportunity to use medication, do it.

I’m a 27 year old female, I was diagnosed with adhd last year. Medication has chaaanged my life after years of feeling hopeless and trying so hard to do the things everyone else seemed to find easy and struggling to keep my head above water while everyone else was swimming fine.
There are things that meds alone can’t fix obviously, there are multiple treatments for adhd that often need to be used together, however there are also lots of positive changes that meds alone made for me.

I don’t feel like I’m drowning anymore, even when I’m struggling it’s just a bit less intense.
I feel happier, so much happier. I would highly suggest doing some research on adhd and really learning how it works. There’s a great podcast called adhd rewired, there’s an early episode that explains the role of dopamine and can give an idea of why mess help.
There’s also a YouTube called how to adhd. She also does a really good job of explaining all sorts of things, and the episodes are pretty short and fun to watch. I also think if I remember correctly she was diagnosed at around 12 and talks about her experience with medication and how it helped. (I think there’s an episode called dear mom thanks for medicating me, or something)

When I was first diagnosed and I started medication I was really angry and upset. Not because of the meds, but because I lived my life until 26 without them and without help and thinking that the problem was me. Pre-diagnosis and meds I felt bad about my ability to function but didn’t know better, but after diagnosis and meds I knew how much easier my life could have been. Even just the tiny differences would have made a huge impact on how my life has gone so far.

I’m diagnosed with anxiety and depression as well and the adhd Meds actually seem to make a huge impact lowering my anxiety, I find things that normally I would put off for days-weeks because of anxiety he asked to do. Sometimes I’ll do something and afterwards I’ll realize that I used to find it really difficult but just found it easy.
I would also like to say that the reason I personally was so open to using medication straight away was that I worked with children with additional needs. A huge variety of needs including adhd, autism, oppositional defiance disorder, dyslexia, developmental delays and pretty much anything else too.

I worked with many students that had been on stimulant medication for years for various things and observed them get older and occasionally their behavior would start to change and their doctor would change their dose or the meds altogether and sometimes it took a while to get right but sometimes within a week it felt like we had a brand new student.
I also witnessed lots of students that hadn’t been on medication before be put on medication and got to see the positive changes happen over time.

One student in particular was non-verbal, prone to meltdowns and violent behavior, didn’t wear shoes, had limited perception for anything kind of outside of their own self. Constantly pacing around the classroom, climbing bookshelves, snatching things off other students if they wanted them including food. Walking around the school kind of ‘searching’ for something that interests them and just wandering into other classes if they saw or thought there might be something in there they want.

They didn’t do these things maliciously, their was just almost like a wall in between them and everything else in the world. One parent was willing to try anything we suggested and would cry when they had to pick the student up early because of an incident. The other parent refused to admit there was anything that needed addressing, everything was fine, just an energetic and adventurous kid that doesn’t talk.

We would never outright suggest medication to parents without being asked, even then you would never say ‘yes I think your child needs medication’ you would always say ‘well medication can be very beneficial for some children but it’s really something that only the doctor can advice you on for your child’.

So parents separate and that one parent organizes medication for the student. That first day on meds they sat in assembly. They clapped when everyone else clapped. They didn’t run away. They walked back to class with the rest of the class. They sat at a table with someone else for the first time. They ate their food at the same time. The wall started coming down.
It’s been 2 or so years since that child started meds and they are fully verbal and communicate typically for a child their age. They haven’t had a violent behavior incident in over a year. They do class work. They’re able to go on excursions. They understand social rules and non-verbal cues and the school rules and being polite vs being rude. They have sympathy and empathy and don’t like to hurt people or their feelings. Medication opened up their entire world where before there was only them.

That’s obviously one of those really high end success stories and meds definitely don’t always make differences that big. I’m not saying that meds are a miracle or that they are the only thing that can help. Just for this particular child meds is what they needed.
For me, meds is one of the things I needed.

I can’t promise that meds will make any difference at all, but they’re one of those things where you won’t know what difference if any they will make unless you try them.
I really hope that if you do decide to medicate that things work well and your child finds their groove in life.

If you decide not to try medication I just urge you not to take it off the table permanently and to keep occasionally considering a trial. I’ll just never forget the hurt feeling after first taking meds, that I could have felt better that whole time but didn’t. I felt like I missed chunks of my life because of adhd. maybe if I had of been diagnosed as a kid and had therapy I would feel differently about meds.

Oh one more thing, I failed math in the last few years of high school.
This year I took a university level math unit and found it easy. It was the same curriculum content as high school math but harder. While going through the topics I have memories of sitting in high school math and the teacher trying to explain that thing and me being unable to get any idea of it.

It could be because I’m older now, or maybe just a miracle haha. But the one math class this year where I forgot to take my medication that day, it felt like he was talking a different language and I was straight back to high school. The next class with meds, I picked it up first try.

My experiences obviously don’t represent every possible scenario or experience with medication. There are negative experiences some times. I just haven’t personally seen any.
If you have any questions feel free to message. If this comment hasn’t made the most sense I apologize, I haven’t yet taken my meds today haha.